"Down with that sort of thing" "Fuppin Hell" - (the one with the sheep) could go on but ill let ye's have a go

Derry_ledd (Derry) - Posts: 2093 - 14/05/2009 16:31:44    283408

when dougal goes to bishop brennan 'how's the son?'

stranmillis29 (Antrim) - Posts: 788 - 14/05/2009 16:41:38    283433

At the over 75s Football Competition.

Dougal: "Ted, did you tell me once, Jack had trials with Liverpool?"
Ted: "No, he was on trial in Liverpool!"

Loyal2TheRoyal (Meath) - Posts: 4522 - 14/05/2009 16:44:13    283442

Tunnel of goats

The Ants are back Ted

I like cake

jimbodub (Dublin) - Posts: 20763 - 14/05/2009 16:44:58    283444

"Don't call me Len you little prick!"

Ted on Jack: "What's that he used to call the needy? He had a term for them"
Dougal: "A shower of b......"

mid-mon man (Monaghan) - Posts: 1680 - 14/05/2009 16:48:06    283453

Dougal: Do you remember that bit when St. Tibulus, he tried to take that banana off the other lad?

Father Ted: That wasn't a banana, Dougal.

JuanVeron (Westmeath) - Posts: 1866 - 14/05/2009 16:50:24    283456

It's like a big tidal wave of jam, only jam made out of old women.

donegal_insider (Donegal) - Posts: 584 - 14/05/2009 16:57:35    283484

My favourite ...

Dougal: God, I've heard about those cults Ted. People dressing up in black and saying Our Lord's going to come back and save us all.
Ted: No, Dougal, that's us. That's Catholicism.
Dougal: Oh right.

RMDrive (Donegal) - Posts: 2202 - 14/05/2009 16:58:46    283487

Father jack- "I love my brick"
Classic

blueroyal (Meath) - Posts: 109 - 14/05/2009 16:59:22    283488

priest:was that the same fr.Foran who was with Fr. Something in wexford? Ted: No no, fr Foran lost the use of his ears. Priest: Oh he's deaf. Ted: No no, he used to be able to wiggle them.... Dougal: ah wise men,thats great,bet tomorrows will be star or something ted:so your changing from your original idea, what was it, oh yea, Ruud Gulliet sitting on a shed!!! Ted: have we any incense dougal? Dougal: eh,eh, em... there was a spider in the bath last night some show!!!

Rhodejim (Offaly) - Posts: 2888 - 14/05/2009 17:08:34    283511

Father Ted: Now concentrate this time, Dougal. These (pointing at some plastic cows on the table in caravan) are very small; those (pointing at some cows out of the window) are far away... small... far away...

Father Ted: Dougal, how did you get into the church? Was it like, "Collect twelve crisp packets and become a priest"?

Loughduff Lad (Cavan) - Posts: 2466 - 14/05/2009 17:12:36    283519

I dont believe it

Duffy89 (Wexford) - Posts: 3320 - 14/05/2009 17:50:13    283583

Thats right WE PUT THE BRICK ON THE ACCELERATOR

laoistownie (Laois) - Posts: 409 - 14/05/2009 18:00:04    283593

Dougel: Do you belive in god ted?

hairyfoot (Wicklow) - Posts: 98 - 14/05/2009 18:07:17    283601

'Carefull Now'

PJ (None) - Posts: 2288 - 14/05/2009 18:11:31    283604

Eoin McLove: Go away! I don't want to catch menopause!

Dougal: Sorry Ted. I was concentrating too hard on looking holy.

Jack: Feck off cup!

Hllbilly_boi (Tyrone) - Posts: 202 - 14/05/2009 19:15:39    283654

From The Passion Of St. Tibulus -

Bishop Brennan: You don't have an area Crilly. Unless, of course, it's a play area with sand castles, and buckets, and spades.

JOKERMAN (Galway) - Posts: 91 - 14/05/2009 19:25:01    283664

"YES, NO, THAT WOULD BE AN ECUMENICAL MATTER"

trileacman (Tyrone) - Posts: 759 - 14/05/2009 20:58:33    283744

No, priests are not fascists, fascists dress all in black and tell people what to do whereas priests....................more drink!

brendtheredhand (Tyrone) - Posts: 10897 - 14/05/2009 21:03:38    283748

Fr. Jack when the house was full of rabbits ''Hairy Japanese ********''

Dr.Shephard (Leitrim) - Posts: 2187 - 14/05/2009 21:30:50    283782