Graham norton in the episode when they are in the caravan. fr fitzgibbon cup, thing about him was he looked like a cup bug curly ears on him.

PK57 (Louth) - Posts: 1660 - 15/05/2009 15:02:49    284531

Dougal to The Lawyer when Jack dies: If you're a solicitor I'm Boy George. Father Purcell: "We run the electricity off the gas and the gas off the electricity and we save a bundle" Dougal: (trying to make out the number eleven on a raffle ticket) Sorry Ted, I was looking at the ticket upside down. Dougal: Ted, did Len find the rabbits? Bishop Brennan: You address me by my proper title, you little b*l*o*ks! Pat Mustard: You wouldn't be advising the use of artificial contraception now Father? Would ya? Father Ted: Yes I...no I...if you're going to be...I...of course you, you...just feck off!

Derry_ledd (Derry) - Posts: 2093 - 15/05/2009 16:02:48    284615

Spider Baby

Ted: If it doesn't look like a baby/spider and it doesn't gurgle at you why do they call it a spider baby?

Dougal: They keep it in a pram!

Pat Mustard

Mrs. Doyle: Father can Pat Mustard put his big tool in my box?

Ted: How dare you.....

Pat Mustard holding giant wrench: i'm afraid i've no room on the float for it father

irishtom (Donegal) - Posts: 219 - 15/05/2009 16:13:29    284628

Dougal when they go to examine the crashed car: ''Its not too bad ted!''.....and the car in absolute *****! classic

tadhgo (Westmeath) - Posts: 50 - 26/06/2009 23:47:57    324500

too many to mention, everything fr purcell says is hilarious!!


Fr Purcell: whats your favourite humming noise?? the first one is the sound of a fridge but the second one is the sound of a man humming


Tom: tis my money father i just didn't want to fill out the forms


Milkman: Better get going, milk gets sour you know unless it's UHT milk but theres no demand for that cause its shite


Fr. Dougal: SPIDER BABY...........


Fr. Dougal: does god really exist?? i dont know, personally i dont even believe in organised religion!!

premierman21 (Tipperary) - Posts: 429 - 27/06/2009 00:27:09    324527

Len Brennan - "If u ever try to bulls**t me like that again, i will rip off your arms!!"

acemarksman (Down) - Posts: 42 - 27/06/2009 01:26:24    324559

the husband and wife that run the local store Reminds me of me and my beloved.

williewentwell (Tyrone) - Posts: 1712 - 27/06/2009 09:05:44    324603

OOOOOOH, DATS A GRAND CAKE NORA!!!

dhorse (Laois) - Posts: 11374 - 27/06/2009 12:23:00    324663

I don't belive it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

_____me_______ (Cavan) - Posts: 36 - 27/06/2009 14:15:30    324747

And for my favourite ever quote....
Black priest kevin sharkey replies to the nun after she speaks highly of all the mission work out in africa---

"Sure what would I know, I'm from donegal.


He is actually from Donegal.

Fredthered (Donegal) - Posts: 1144 - 27/06/2009 17:49:29    324824

''They told him to cut it down to 8 hours a day, but he just could'nt stop dancing!''

tadhgo (Westmeath) - Posts: 50 - 27/06/2009 22:00:43    324932

i hear your a racist now father.... Dougal: Sorry Ted. I was concentrating too hard on looking holy. Bishop Brennan: He DID kick me up the ****! Dougal: I'm no good at judging the size of crowds Ted, but I'd say there's about seventeen million of them out there Dougal: Hello there Len. Bishop Brennan: Don't call me Len, you p***k. Refer to me as 'Bishop Brennan'! Dougal: Ah rught you are so Len Dougal: As if magic, I can create a big crowd of invisible ducks Ted: So... let me get this straight. You were up on an old man, riding him around and whipping him. For an hour. Dougal: Yes. Ted: You realise that image will stay with me for the rest of my life?

bountyhunter (Cavan) - Posts: 302 - 29/06/2009 01:34:46    325938

Ted tryin to open the car while being chased by a naked man;

Dougal: Ah yer OK there Ted he's still a fair bit away yet

panboxty (Leitrim) - Posts: 129 - 29/06/2009 12:58:06    326330

DOUGAL: I read somewhere, I think it was in an article about priest socks that priest socks are blacker than any other type of socks.

This is so true, I remember the priest visiting the house when I was a kid, I was mesmerised at how black his socks were. Strange. But true.

KerryLondonder (None) - Posts: 37 - 29/06/2009 14:09:19    326463

"Ride me sideways is another one" Mrs Doyle

xxx (Mayo) - Posts: 1275 - 29/06/2009 14:56:51    326545

Are those my feet?

Mick14 (Limerick) - Posts: 766 - 29/06/2009 15:38:46    326612

The one were father jack is sober. FLOOOOR, CUR-TAINS (looks at ted) GOB*****. I remember, i remember. Absolutely hilarious.

PK57 (Louth) - Posts: 1660 - 29/06/2009 19:12:29    326893

Hell

When the fella in the towel is chasin after ted and dougal


Ted:(when the man is puncturing the tires) Ah now come on, theres no need for that

Dougal: He's puncturin the tires ted

jimbob (None) - Posts: 91 - 30/06/2009 02:49:46    327265

I shot a man faadder!! ( Pat Shortt)

ExilEd1014 (Mayo) - Posts: 280 - 30/06/2009 14:14:30    327665

Do you know the damage a bomb can do??..itcan blow your face through the side of a tree!!

The police are after me ! Oh they're not.. Yes im so gorgeous the want to put me under arrest!!

teresa i forgot me feckin trousers !!

Pat was wondering could he put his massive tool in my box? what!! how dare yoYES its too big for the milk float

pat mustard classics

In the Parish ! (Mayo) - Posts: 448 - 01/07/2009 03:25:46    328363