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Favourite Father Ted quotes

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Ah ye reduced that quote to nothing

Dr.Shephard (Leitrim) - Posts: 2187 - 14/05/2009 21:38:12    283794

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we're all going to heaven lads........wahey!

stranmillis29 (Antrim) - Posts: 788 - 14/05/2009 21:43:54    283807

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Dougal - " The money was only resting in your bank account, Ted. "

Cavan_Slasher (Cavan) - Posts: 10253 - 14/05/2009 22:01:13    283828

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when the prisets r in the plane and one says y dont we just have a bit of a pray and all the prists kind og giggle at him

takeyourgoals (Fermanagh) - Posts: 51 - 14/05/2009 22:07:39    283835

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Father Stack (Brendan Grace) - ''What are we watchin?'' Priest - ''Eh were watchin the sports day'' Father Stack - ''A loada young fellas runnin around in shorts. (Looks at another priest who looks back sheepishly) Thats what you like to watch isnt it? Only your imagining them without the shorts. Your sittin there, imaginin that with a BIG smile on your face.......Ya dirty fecker!'' Fr Ted - ''If your trying to embarass us, your not succeeding'' Fr Stack - ''Yes I am'' Priest - ''I think your a very rude priest'' Fr Stack - ''If you ever say that to me again, Ill put your head through the wall'' Fr Stack - ''See ya girls....Pair o *******'' Classic HAHAHAHA

spudenator (Laois) - Posts: 1052 - 14/05/2009 22:19:08    283849

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Ted: FARGO BOYLE!!!!!!!!!!

crowd: awwwwwhhhaaawww ****in hell

bigcook (Longford) - Posts: 129 - 14/05/2009 22:27:04    283864

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Dougal: I'm not surprised Ted. If I was a sheep. I'd be watching my back right now.

Ted: Why?

Dougal: Because of the beast. They say it's as big as four cats, and it's got a retractable leg so as it can leap up at you better and you know what Ted, it lights up at night, and it's got four ears. Two of them are for listening and the other two are kind of back-up ears, and it's claws are as big as cups and for some reason it's got a tremendous fear of stamps and Mrs. Doyle was tellin' me that it's got magnets on it's tail so's if you're made out of metal it can attach itself to you, and instead of a mouth it's got four arses

smallballs (Monaghan) - Posts: 151 - 14/05/2009 22:30:01    283866

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yeah if u say tha 2 me again i will put your though the wall is one of the best

takeyourgoals (Fermanagh) - Posts: 51 - 14/05/2009 22:30:28    283867

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"I think i'm going mad Ted" thats a favourite one of mine from Dougal think it was the episode in the caves

left back (None) - Posts: 83 - 14/05/2009 22:43:23    283882

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to Fr.Stone after a long pause......."Have you seeen fr. Shortall recently?"

hilarious ep!

stranmillis29 (Antrim) - Posts: 788 - 14/05/2009 22:50:12    283892

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"terrible ted, terrible"

32_4_1 (Meath) - Posts: 4124 - 14/05/2009 22:58:24    283906

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"No Dougal, we want to stay out of the whole are of actually being in love with the horse"

KunAguero (Sligo) - Posts: 98 - 15/05/2009 09:40:44    284108

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John & Mary the couple who are always fighting. "Get those feckin Crunchies out of the car!" "You've a face on ya like a pair of t*t*!" "Well at least that's one pair between us!"

Lockjaw (Donegal) - Posts: 9732 - 15/05/2009 10:20:51    284149

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"Ted, do you remember that fella who was so good at fashion, they had to shoot him."

Breffni40 (Cavan) - Posts: 12291 - 15/05/2009 10:26:22    284158

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No, Father. It's my money. I just didn't want to fill out the forms.

pearsesabu (Antrim) - Posts: 663 - 15/05/2009 10:38:00    284171

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"your **** is like a loaf of bread, and i want a slice of it"

glenn_abu (Down) - Posts: 515 - 15/05/2009 11:52:52    284267

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fr. damo: Blur or Oasis

dougal : Blur

damo : WHAT

dougal : Oasis, i mean Oasis

ljd01 (Meath) - Posts: 18 - 15/05/2009 12:09:14    284295

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'Hoh right ya'

conor15 (None) - Posts: 347 - 15/05/2009 13:23:06    284386

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"cowboys Ted, they're all Cowboys"
Preist after he stciks his foot through the door. Think it was the lovely girls episode

Yop (Wexford) - Posts: 362 - 15/05/2009 14:25:33    284461

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Where do you start...

as a massive fan of ted, i've spent countless hours watching and re watching the episodes. The best bits however are the ones that aren't apparent, are in the background and are only noticed after watching several times.

Few examples to watch out for. The euro song episode. It shows a list of all the songs and artists. Some of the song titles are brilliant...one goes if i'm not mistaken "Get out ye shower of englis b*******"

Also another brilliant episode. The golden cleric award one. Preparations are in full flight. Over the loud speaker in the back there's an announcement for one of the priests. "Father eric sweeney your parochial house has burnt down."

And for my favourite ever quote....
Black priest kevin sharkey replies to the nun after she speaks highly of all the mission work out in africa---

"Sure what would I know, I'm from donegal.

johnnos bulls (None) - Posts: 527 - 15/05/2009 15:01:43    284527

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